I Know What It Is Like When No One Sees Your Pain
Lots of Personal loss and grief, in addition to 30 + years serving families through loss and grief
My first experience with invisible grief happened before I was ten years old.
Three significant losses before age 10. Three moves. Three different schools; all before the age of 10. Each transition erased a version of myself that I had barely had time to become.
While other losses in my life received recognition, deaths, divorces, relocations, it was the invisible losses that cut deepest: the friendships that ended with each move, the sense of belonging I never quite found, the stability I craved but could not name.
Later came the losses adults face but rarely discuss, like job loss that shattered my identity. Divorce that grieved not just a person, but a future. The slow erosion of dreams I had held sacred. The person I was before, life reshaped me into someone I did not quite recognize.
I learned something profound through these invisible losses:
Healing does not mean "getting over" someone or something. It means learning to carry love, and loss, in new ways. It means honoring what was while discovering who you are becoming.
My Professional Journey:
For over 30 years, I worked in funeral homes and cemeteries, bearing witness to thousands of families navigating their darkest moments. I watched loss and grief in all its forms, the socially sanctioned grief that came with flowers and support, and the invisible grief that people carried alone.
I saw widows grieve not just their husbands, but their identity as wives. I watched adult children mourn parents they had complicated relationships with, unable to express their ambivalent grief. I witnessed the silent grief of miscarriage, the dismissed grief of pet loss, the stigmatized grief of suicide or overdose.
The funeral industry taught me that some of the deepest grief happens in the spaces between official losses.
Why I Specialized in Invisible Grief:
After decades of professional experience and my own winding grief journey, I realized my calling: to witness and honor the losses society does not see.
"I Heal Invisible Grief, Because Every Loss Deserves to Be Seen.
"The empty nest mother who is grieving her identity while everyone says, "congratulations on your freedom."
The woman navigating infertility who faces endless "when are you having kids?" questions.
The divorcee who is not just mourning a marriage, but an entirely imagined future.
The person with chronic illness who is grieving the body and life they used to have.
The career changer who's left behind is not just a job, but professional identity and purpose.
These are the grief journeys that often go unwitnessed. This is where I offer sacred companionship.
My Approach
The Seasons of Healing
Through my own invisible losses and professional experience, I developed The Seasons of Healing™ framework, a cyclical, nature-based approach that honors how grief actually moves: not in straight lines, but in seasons that spiral and return.
Winter → Name the Unseen (recognizing invisible loss)
Spring → Honor with Ritual (creating sacred practices)
Summer → Reclaim the Self (discovering who you are becoming)
Autumn → Live the Legacy (carrying love forward with purpose)
This is not therapy. It is not a quick fix. It is sacred companionship through one of life's most profound passages, the transformation that happens when everything familiar falls away and you must discover who you are becoming.
What I Believe:
- Your invisible grief is real grief, worthy of the same care as any recognized loss
- You are not broken; you are becoming, grief is transformation, not pathology
- Healing happens in seasons, not straight lines, you do not have to follow anyone else's timeline
- You do not need to bounce back; you can rise differently, transformation honors both loss and becoming
- Every loss deserves witnessing, no grief is too small, too complicated, or too invisible to matter
My Invitation:
If you are carrying an invisible loss that no one else seems to understand, if you are tired of pretending you are fine when you are actually grieving, if you are ready to honor your loss while discovering who you are becoming,
I see you. Your grief is real. And I would be honored to walk beside you.
